Friday, June 29, 2012

Take Me Home, Country Roads... WV

When I say, 'Take me home country roads', I truly mean it.  My parents were both raised in West Virginia, so going there has a special meaning for me. My mother grew up in the Morgantown area, which is where I was headed.  Getting there, however, proved to be as much of a challenge and adventure as riding Alp D'Huez!

I left Winchester,VA  late because I tried, unsuccessfully, to get some mechanical issues fixed. Letting my host for the weekend know, she returned my text, warning me of powerful storms moving into the area and to be careful.  Not having access to the weather report, I remained blithely ignorant of the developing situation, driving west with nary a care, sucking down a 32 ounces of water as I went.  --Gotta stay hydrated, you know!!

With just ten miles left to travel, and the sun gently sinking behind the mountains, a big splattering raindrop hit the windshield....then another....and another. Plop...plop...plop...plop plop plop plop. The sky lost all light, as if someone had flipped the switch, and the heavens opened up, dumping water like a broken fire hydrant. It happened very quickly; I couldn't see anything beyond the windsheild.. The wipers were useless; they simply could not keep up.  I was very aware of the danger I was in due to the lack of visibilty and the speed at which I was travelling.  Flipping on my hazard lights, I took my foot off the gas to de-accelerate. praying those behind me would see me and do the same. I didn't want to use my brakes for fear of hydroplaning.  Unable see anything but a sheet of silver gray water washing down my windshield, I felt my way to the shoulder by riding the rumble strip. Never did I think I would be grateful for that bone-jarring ride!  As trucks and cars continued to splash by, and I just prayed they would see me.  Finally with wind howling and torrents of rain coming down and being blown like a hurricane, all traffic stopped; everyone was pulled over, waiting for the monsoon to stop.

Sure I was in the epicenter of the storm, I covered my ears as the thunder rolled over the car, shaking it.  The lightening strikes were close enough to raise the hair on my arms, cracking like whip as it ripped through the air.  The wind was blew furiously, shaking the car sideways,and as the water rushed down the mountain, it pushed the car forward. I felt like I was on a carnival ride.  I was scared, but I knew I was going to be okay.  I just had to sit it out.

The storm raged on and on and as it did, that 32 ounces of water I drank....well, you can imagine.  Couple that with listening to water all around me, and I was in a world of hurt.  How much longer was this storm going to last?  I didn't dare get out of the car nor would it have been wise to drive it to find a gas station.  Oh's times like these I wish I was a man!

The storm finally passed, and people began to drive again.  I made a beeline to the first exit I saw and headed straight to the ladies' room.  The closer I got, the more the pressure built. 

 "oh please, oh please, let me make it!!"

I barged through the door, and.....THERE WAS A LINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Standing like a picnic table, I weighed my options, then headed to the Men's room.  Knocking, no one answered, so in I went. Pushing the seat down with my foot, I sought relief, and was about to emerge from the stall, when  a man entered the bathroom.


Oh no, now what am I going to do?  Should I put my feet up so he doesn't know I'm there? I just sat there, as quiet as a mouse.

The door opened again, and another man entered.  The two grunted at each other, then, 'zzzzippp'....there he went, too, neither of them speaking.  I've always wondered about etiquette in the Men's room, and now I know....they ignore each other...they also don't wash their hands!  

Finally,business concluded, they left.  I bolted out of there before someone else entered, dashing right into the t-shirt clad gut of some big guy coming in.

Ah....the embarrassment.  What does one say in this situation....."don't forget to wash your hands?".....


  1. That part about the bathroom was hilarious. I almost broke my water". LOL